Love It or Love Not?

It's been two years that M and I are together..
The love is great. The sex is great.

I just had to say it. Last night was greater.

A Return From No Where

As i try to fix my life, i found this blog.

But nothing changed.

So here I am again, in the attempt to make this comeback real.

***************************************************************************************************

My life now is a routine, I bet yours too. I wake up, go to work, teach, do paper works, go to school, go out with friends then sleep. Mondays to Fridays. My weekends are also the same. I wake up, watch tv, use the internet, read, go out, come home, then sleep.

The question is: Is this the life that I want to live?
The answer: No.

**************************************************************************************************

Mono or Poly?

I was chatting with my bestfriend yesterday when out of the blue, our conversation went off the topic, from lomo cameras to men being polygamous.

I cannot believe that my bestfriend, whom i know since God knows when, is telling me that he agrees that men are permitted by society to just date and sleep around because of one reason: that all men do and life is indeed unfair.

Yes, i know that this is an accepted fallacy (is there such?).

BUT... for someone, close to me and who I've known since i was kid, join the bandwagon and practice that lifestyle, the hit was bad.

Unlike my bestfriend whom I've known for ages, I've been with hiM for close to 7 months now. It's not that I'm having doubts about hiM but I'm a bit worried, until when can he keep his word that he will stick with me (and only me -- given his reputation and all) till the end?

In the polygamous world that men created, can at least half of them survive the trap?

and the question is, Will my Man join them or will he walk away?

The Blow

He was begging for it since day 1.

Funny how he can ask for such a thing when one of the factors that made me agree to be with him was that he promised to wait till marriage before we can get physical. I'm such an idiot when it comes to this, how can a man keep his word when it comes to sex? and how can i propose such a thing when deep down i know that i dream of kissing him since the first day of courtship. Talk about pretensions against temptations here.


After 6 months, i finally gave him what he wanted. He was out of control, so am I. He was satisfied, I felt proud.



Now, I'm not sure if im doing it for Love.

All I Want For New Year Is This.

Eversince i was a little girl, i dream of marrying the right man -- my prince charming at an early age (around 22?). I've been in long term relationships that i thought would last, I finished my studies and graduated right on time for my target and even pictured the whole scene in my mind repeatedly.

and now:

• I'm turning 24 this year.
• Only been with my boyfriend for six months now who should i add is planning to get married at 27 (he's turning 23 this year) and still in the process of getting to know his family.
• I'm NOT earning enough for my well pictured wedding -- not even for my wedding gown.
• I'm still juggling my Masteral, Teaching, Work, Scholarship Application for a foreign university, Career Shift.
• I'm worried about being pregnant.

but still, all i want right now is this, given at the right time and place:the perfect engagement ring.

The Introduction

This is my third attempt to create a blog. I have been all over cyberspace for quite sometime doing everything --studying, working, blogging, chatting, friendste-ring, multiply-ing, EVERYTHING.

But this will be my alter ego, my side B, the other side, the darker side, the yin to my yang.

Being raised in a very conservative family, please allow me to speak to you in a very straightforward and honest manner without revealing who I really am. I'm not ready yet, i just cannot continue keeping everything to myself.